Selah Aja

Creating a life of romance and luxury, is not reliant upon material things, how others perceive your life, or about convincing others to see your life lived a certain way. It is a decision to live a beautifully full life by enriching the way it feels. Enriching the way you feel.

It is our responsibility to love ourselves well—first and foremost—in all aspects of life. And we deserve to be met with, and give ourselves satisfying and fulfilling experiences.

And since I’m all about creating and indulging in beautiful experiences, I want to share some insight on things that have helped me to romanticize my life.

Improve your relationship with solitude.
To improve your relationship with yourself, is to improve your relationship with everything else around you. Solitude allows you to embrace change, learn new things from within, and helps you grow into yourself by becoming self-aware. It’s important to rest in solitude for a few moments throughout the day to make room for the things that are for you. During this time spent alone, learn more about you—what you love, what you desire, and gain clarity on your needs (what you need to be happy, what keeps you calm, etc.). You can start with creating new customs that align with all that is important to you, and put it in action, to live a life reflective of those needs. Whether you create a new morning/evening routine, go on a drive, go on a retreat/vacation, or sit and meditate. This is your time and space to get clear about you. Prioritize you.
Practice mindfulness.
We are constantly moved & inspired by the things going on around us. And social media plays a huge role in lack of presence. I’ll be the first to admit that at times the first thing I do when waking up in the morning, is check social media. And I’ve observed how it effects my focus, time management, and mood. What has helped me to remain mindful & present is limiting time off of social media, especially in the morning, slow down, read my devotional, pray, and listen to an insightful podcast episode or sermon. What also helps is journaling, making eye contact while speaking with others, and placing my phone down and out of site when eating out with others. All in all, I do my best to stay in the present in the moments that are good and healthy for my body and spirit by creating narratives that reinforce mindfulness. Point: slow down + be still + remain in the present moment.
Take yourself on solo dates.
As a lover, I know that expressing love outwardly, towards others, can oftentimes be prioritized above the love we give to ourselves. Solo-dates have been the best thing that has ever happened to me lol! Single or not, solo-dates are for you. I get dressed up, spray on my smell goods, and head out to enjoy my own company—no distractions. I’ve taken myself out to movies, restaurants, spas, even out of town to just enjoy the all the beautiful things life has to offer, without waiting for it to be offered to me. I don’t feel lonely because I am experiencing moments with myself. Shoot! I feel more comfortable, because I know who I am & I like my own company. Plus, I like me lol—a lot. This week, take yourself out for lunch/dinner or to a movie! You deserve it.
Seek & prioritize the grand simple things.
Simply put: Gratitude. It’s all around you. Find beauty in the world created around you. Find beauty in the senses you are blessed with to enjoy the beauty around you. Next time you’re out at a coffee shop, activate your 5-senses (touch, taste, smell, sight, sound) & see how it inspires you. Find beauty in the obvious and not so obvious. Gratitude will always be the answer to a healthier more luxurious relationship with yourself & how you experience life!
Just do you.
Do all the things. If there is something you love, incorporate it every experience. For me 1) candles. Love them. They set the ambiance while cooking dinner, after a long shower, while cleaning, gatherings, etc. You name it! They are with me everywhere I go. Lol. 2) When going out of town, rooftop lounges/restaurants aka stunning views & aesthetics will always be my jam lol. Leave it to me to find the coolest/photo-op reputable restaurants to dine lol! And best believe, the food reviews will indeed match (Yep. I’m a yelp girl, too. Haha!) lol! 3) Flowers. Do I need to say it?! I’m in love with them. They must be in every room. And as a ‘learn-as-I-go’ aspiring florist, they uplift my mood like no other. Essential for anything ever. 4) A dope curated playlist to fit the mood. I’ll never go without. Music is my life lol. I don’t shower without it, cook without it, work without it, or drive without it. It goes where I go. Lol! These are just a few things that I incorporate to add luxury to my life. Make it unique to you!

Romanticizing my life or what I consider, #TheFragrantLife, is all about creating a life reflective of love, growth, peace, joy, and ease. And mindfulness/intentionality, gratitude, authenticity, grand simple things, and solitude all bring a level of romance and luxury I don’t want to go a day without.

I pray that my fragrant life will lead you to romanticize your very own life—filling it with sweet moments, soft gestures, generous love, and growth galore. One that outlives a single moment and builds/adds character. Romanticize your life, loved one. You deserve to.